Grief.

To whomever I shared my sensitive struggle regarding Christianity with:

Why did you share it to another out of its context, making Christianity, my struggle, and the matter related to it very offensive to the hearer? Have you not discretion or wisdom in your heart? Have you no heart to not hurt the hearer? Why should you put even more obstacle in their way? Why should I trust you with my struggle, if you would take it and tell it to the very person who should never hear it OUT OF CONTEXT? The worst part is, WHY DID I TRUST YOU?

Yet I, too, have to find in myself the grace to forgive you.




Dearest the hearer, which memory of I treasure more that I even realize:
an "idol" could mean a million things. Please don't let a meaning hurt you. Trust me, it's not the meaning in the way you think that I meant it. Idolatry is one of my biggest problems. Idolatry is one of our biggest problems. Before you take offence, please carefully observe the entire Christianity framework the word lays on.

And I am grieved for all the pain this has caused you.

I have no one else to blame but myself.

My own rebellion against God has hurt not only myself - but also others around me.